Perfect

Got a call from an old friend…. Sad news. Cancer. We cried. We talked about all the times we spent together – all the talks, all the laughs, all the cries, all the sharing our day, all our hopes and fears, all our everything. Our friendship. The thing we treasure most in life.

She talked about hoping to go to heaven. I said, “Do you want to go to heaven?” She said, “Yes!” I said, “All you have to do is tell Jesus you want to go to heaven! It’s that simple.” We cried. She talked about going even though she does not want to and waiting for me to come in (hopefully) years to come. We cried again. I told her how much I will miss her and how I want to talk every day we can and not cry; but laugh and remember and tell each other how much our friendship has meant to each of us. We do not know how long it will be.

I know I should be dancing. Another child of God gets to go home. Gets to walk the streets of gold. No more tears, no more sadness, no more money trouble, no more watching others we love suffer and be lost, no more bad news headlines, no pain, no more medical reports, just Paradise. Home with Jesus, finally. Strangely enough, I cry.

Another girlfriend and I talked about our other losses and we agree – heaven is PERFECT. Who wouldn’t want to be home? There, everything and everyone is perfect. Sometimes I wish it was my time to go home so even I, too, can be perfect. Imagine that, I thought I already was and am perfect. Turns out, I need to be home before I am perfect. When I get home I will always say the right thing, think the right thing, be polite, have patience, love the way I wish I could always do now, never be afraid again, understand all the things that do not make sense to me here, see the ones I lost and miss, and cast my crown at the feet of my Savior, Jesus. I will be home and perfect.

The sun is setting for some today. I say, ‘wait for me Grandpa and Grandma and Aunts and Uncles and Brothers and Mom and Dad and many others I have loved that are home now – I will be there soon. Too soon.’

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